Adapted from When Your Hormones Go Haywire. Copyright 2003, 2005, Pamela M. Smith. Used by permission.
Whether you’re in your late thirties, mid-forties, or early fifties you know that your body is behaving differently from what it once did. It is different, and not just because of the never ceasing stress demands of life – career, family, too much to do, to little time to do it. Sure, those stresses show in occasional dark circles under our eyes, but there’s more. Now there are those unpredictable moods, the restless nights, roller-coaster energy levels, expanding waistlines, fuzzy thinking, heart palpitations, surprise tears, anxiety and paranoia, strange appetite cravings.
There are more than twenty million baby boomers just like us who are currently experiencing these same symptoms – and there are twenty million more right behind us. Every eight minutes, an American woman turns fifty; within the next twenty-five years, more than fifty million American women will be over that mile marker.
Many of these women will sail through this mid-life crossing, noticing little different with their bodies than that periods have stopped, and it’s even harder to manage their weight. Others feel as though they’ve entered a storm from which they may never emerge, as though they’ve been caught in hurricane winds that threaten to blow away their emotional and physical health as well as their most important relationships.
We certainly aren’t the first women in history to experience menopausal changes; after all, we watched our moms go through them. But they didn’t talk much about it, and we sure didn’t ask. Even if they discussed with us what they were feeling, we more than likely wouldn’t have thought it would apply to us.
We certainly are the first generation to knowledgeably question the way mid-life has always been done and to choose to do it “our way,” a new way – and a healthy one.
It’s ironic that the old catchword for menopause was “the change.” As a woman in mid-life, you can embrace this need for change. Your reproductive system, body composition, moods, skin, hair, libido, life roles, and relationships – everything is in transition, so rejoice in it!
NEW LIFE
In any change, there is a golden opportunity to create new life. In this time of “the” change, we can see new life being created in ourselves. We become freer to choose where to direct our efforts and energies. Personal passions and interests burst forth, which many women funnel into new businesses, ministries, careers, volunteerism, or hobbies.
Women who do not fear this make a relatively smooth transition, emotionally and physically. Women who do not fear this make a relatively smooth transition, emotionally and physically. Women who don’t look at self as the original four-letter word learn how to balance their own needs with the needs and approval of others.
REACH OUT, CONNECT AND CHOOSE TO LET GO
Women connecting together is a time-honored practice. Whether it’s an occasional get-together for tea, participating in a monthly meeting to discuss books or stocks, walking together in beautiful places, cooking and sharing a special meal, scrapbooking together, or coming together for prayer or baking bread, you will come away from these gathering replenished and a bit more carefree.
Rather than accepting a fate of being forty, fat, miserable, flighty, and tired, we can hold onto each other for support, reclaiming our strength, vitality, and enthusiasm for life.
We are social beings who need regular contact with others to produce and perform optimally. Connecting with friends, especially those in whom we can confide and be natural, has been shown to promote mental health as well as physical well-being.
Isn’t wholeness what we really want in our frenzied and frazzled lives of fulfilling so many roles? We want to be sewn back together and not continue to be fragmented and torn.
We cannot obtain that wholeness by working harder, taking pills or potions, or ordering something through an infomercial special. Deep in our souls we know that; what we’ve been doing just isn’t working. I believe that we receive that wholeness when we reach out – like above – in faith.
For me, reaching out in faith means that I open my hands to God and let go of what I am tightly holding onto, relinquishing the belief that I an control my world. Choosing to let go, to reach out and be rescued by God, is my path to living a life with spiritual connection. It nourishes my soul the same way that food and water nourish my body. Coming to my Creator with a genuine willingness to receive wholeness and peace.
FRIENDSHIPS THROUGH FITNESS
– Participating in recreational activities, exercising at a fitness facility and doing most anything physical are natural opportunities to strengthen existing friendships and develop new ones.
– Not sure how to use a machine in the gym? Need someone to back you up (spot you) while lifting a weight? Look for another woman in the gym that you can ask. Likewise, look for opportunities to offer a helping hand, demonstrate or simply encourage another woman.
– Use your fitness facility’s bulletin board to invite women to a designated time for exercise. Add to the time an optional extended period for a healthy snack, conversation time, book reading or more.
– Invite women from your church, club, workplace or neighborhood to your gym. Talk with your fitness facility in advance. The management may be able to provide a few days of free guest memberships to give your gathering that extra starting support.
Pamela Smith, R.D. (www.pamsmith.com) coaches professional, corporate and life athletes in winning plans and creates menus for some of America’s best restaurants and resorts. She is the best-selling author of “Eat Well, Live Well” and “The Energy Edge” and her newest, “When Your Hormones Go Haywire” Her radio spot “Tips for Living Well” may be heard on over 800 stations nationwide.
