Getting’ It On God’s Way
Exercise and eating well are part of getting healthy, but did you know that it also helps with libido and emotional health? I’ve had female clients in the past who have mentioned that they had not made love to their spouses in months and some even years. When individuals take long breaks from exercise and proper nutrition it can tend to show up in lack of sex drive. Having long breaks from intimacy can cause emotional disconnect from your spouse and can lead to feelings of insecurity as well.
I’m a firm believer that God wants you to be “gettin’ it on” with our spouse. In fact the only reason I’ve ever found in the Bible for taking a “break” is if you have dedicated yourself in solitude to prayer and fasting — and then ONLY if the other spouse agrees to it. You can find this reference in 1 Corinthians 7:5, “Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”
Sexual intimacy isn’t the most important part of a marriage, but it should be of significant importance to both partners to find time to spend together, alone, ministering to one another sexually – it brings healing, comfort and closeness to the relationship.
If you are struggling with your own sexual health and are lacking in the desire department, here are a few tips:
1. Start exercising, it increases blood flow and helps us feel more “in the mood”.
2. Eat well. When we eat better we tend to lose weight and feel better about ourselves which can lead to more self confidence and less avoidance and covering up.
3. Find a qualified counselor, pastor or doctor who can help you work through your issues. Don’t continue to ignore the problem and hope it goes away.
4. Read Sheet Music by Dr. Kevin Lemen. He has been a guest on Oprah multiple times and has a humorous side with great chapters like: Too Pooped to Whoop,
Thirty-One Flavors and None of Them are Ice Cream, and A Very Good Gift Indeed. I have heard Dr. Leman several times over the years and let me tell you, he is a great teacher and he downright funny! Any of his material would be beneficial to you and your spouse.
The Lord wants your marriage to prosper in every way, including sexually. In the Garden of Eden God saw that man was alone and He created a woman to spend time with Adam and be his companion, helper, and friend. Proverbs 5:18-19 paints a wonderful picture of marriage, “Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.”
Dear Father, I deeply desire a satisfying sexual relationship with my spouse. I desire to minister to him/her in a way that is pleasing to you. Please help me take care of myself so that I can minister sexually to my spouse in a way that’s pleasing to him/her and to you. I ask that you abundantly bless our marriage with love, gentleness, friendship, closeness, and a big heap of fun, in Jesus name, Amen.
